Groan Old Party (The Zombie Caucus)
The GOP as a zombie horde eating checks, balances, and basic decency.
For your Halloween playlist!
I assumed the kind of dark heavy metal genres would work best for this song (and they do!) but I really like the satiric rock version I’m featuring because it better gets at the mocking, contemptible tone I was going for.
Be sure to check out the alternative genres below.
Lyrics
Big Ugly Bill, a G.O.P. zombie feed,
ICE gets cash to harass and seize.
Hotlines, raids, blacked-out vans,
Republicans moan (Aye), expand the plans.
No oversight, they greenlight the fleece,
Call it a slush fund for their secret police.
“Due process” on the chopping block,
They eat the watchdog, ignore the shock.
Oversight abandoned, the lights going dim,
They circle the carcass to tear it limb by limb.
Groan Old Party on the leash,
(Ayyyye, Ayyyye)
They eat Checks, bite Balances…capisci?
(Ayyyye, Ayyyye)
Oversight? They chew it thin,
Rights on the plate, dig in, dig in.
Republicans cut your credits, raise your fees,
Your premiums spike twenty percent, at least.
The Budget Office says millions will lose,
They vote (Aye) and sell it as news.
Families’ coverage priced to break,
Parents choose food and swallow the ache.
Doctor’s door shuts, pharmacy waits,
They call this pain “market rates.”
Oversight abandoned, the lights going dim,
They circle the carcass to tear it limb by limb.
Groan Old Party on the leash,
(Ayyyye, Ayyyye)
They eat Checks, bite Balances…capisci?
(Ayyyye, Ayyyye)
Oversight? They chew it thin,
Rights on the plate, dig in, dig in.
Trade war talk and our exports die,
Soy at the elevator priced to cry.
Notes come due while our buyers flee,
Republican zombies moan (Ayyyye) and agree.
Forty billion floated to Argentina’s side,
Zombie caucus cheers while we eat pride.
Grain bins brim while our loans turn red,
They feed on the heartland, Trump pats our head.
Oversight abandoned, the lights going dim,
They circle the carcass to tear it limb by limb.
Groan Old Party on the leash,
(Ayyyye, Ayyyye)
They eat Checks, bite Balances…capisci?
(Ayyyye, Ayyyye)
Oversight? They chew it thin,
Rights on the plate, dig in, dig in.
Release the Epstein Files, bring it to the floor,
Speaker Johnson calls recess, shuts the door.
Petitions stack up while the calendar stalls,
Republican zombies groan (Aye), close the halls.
Victims wait while the minutes are chewed,
Truth on the plate but the horde refused.
They promised sunlight, then drew the shade,
Republicans guard the secrets; we get played.
Oversight abandoned, the lights going dim,
They circle the carcass to tear it limb by limb.
Groan Old Party on the leash,
(Ayyyye, Ayyyye)
They eat Checks, bite Balances…capisci?
(Ayyyye, Ayyyye)
Oversight? They chew it thin,
Rights on the plate, dig in, dig in.
He destroys the White House, that pathetic clown,
History boxed and shipped out of town.
A gilded room planned with mirrors to preen,
G.O.P. zombies shrug, sight unseen.
Trump shits on constituents in a viral clip,
Republicans nod along and lick their lips.
Trump mocks the country he claims to lead,
The zombie caucus serves the insult, watches us bleed
Groan Old Party on the leash,
(Ayyyye, Ayyyye)
They eat Checks, bite Balances…capisci?
(Ayyyye, Ayyyye)
Oversight? They chew it thin,
Rights on the plate, dig in, dig in.